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In “the inspectors” (line 5), the definite article can be omitted.

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Both Besides and Furthermore can be used instead of “In addition” (line 2).

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The adverb “often” as in “these food fads are often based” (line 18) is more commonly placed before the verb to be.

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In paragraph 3, using in spite of the fact that instead of “Although” will not affect the meaning of the sentence.

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In 1993 the dog population in Britain increased by 7 million.

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The sentence “the inspectors recommend the introduction of ‘homework charters’” (lines 5 and 6) can be expressed as follows: The inspectors recommend to introduce “homework charters”.

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The preposition “up” in “crept up” (line 6) is optional.

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“even if” (line 7) can be replaced by even though without affecting the meaning of the sentence.

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It is clearly stated in the text that there are now more cats than dogs in British homes.

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The singular form of “these” (line 11) can be this or that.